We can say with confidence that every parent wants to have trusting relationship with your child. So that he shares his thoughts and honestly talked about everything that happens throughout of the day. But very often what happens is not at all how we dream.
Contents
Why are children still lying?
First you need to figure out when it starts. Baby lie in early preschool age indicates the development of his intelligence. He can compose extraordinary stories on the go, with inventing new details at every step. And the more deployed his story, the better his fantasy works. In this age childhood lies are inevitable.
When the child continues to lie in the future, it becomes more unpleasant and tangible to others. At school age he may lie to parents, teachers, classmates. Main reason lying at this age is the goal he wants to achieve in the result of this situation. Parents pose in front of a schoolboy certain requirements: he must study well, obey adults, behave well in public places.
For a child who is already in a difficult situation, that’s all pretty hard. Therefore, he is trying to protect himself with lies. When parents are interested in grades or behavior at school, the child, so as not to upset mom and dad, says that everything is fine, even if this is not entirely true. Often parents themselves provoke child to lie, promising him something treasured, in return for something not very nice. For example, eat porridge-dame candy.
Children begin to lie to their peers, trying to seem better, smarter, more successful, richer than others who are now with them.
You can conclude that all children are lying. You only need to separate an innocent lie in a situation where a child cannot help but lie, and his fantasy came true and it is clear that this is just a game. Other when a child starts lying about what’s real with him going on. When this carries a psychological reason, here then you need to think about the causes of this lie.
Fantasy needs to be encouraged.
The main thing in such situations is to learn to distinguish the imagination of a child from lies. Fantasy needs to be encouraged. No matter how far the child went in his stories, no need to stop him and scold. The fantasy of the child contributes to the development of his intellect, his creative thinking. With the help of his imagination, the child does not try to achieve something, does not pursue any specific goals.
With the help of lies, the child will achieve any goal. Lying is always connected with some situation in life a child. It will not be an abstract long colorful story with all the details, and a short answer to the question.
Lying is an integral part of any person’s life. But she should not accompany the relationship of parents and children. Need to fix parental relationships so that he can honestly talk about your health, about events at school and with friends. If the child does not say anything, fearing a negative reaction on the part of parents, and it’s easier for him to lie, so as not to hear reproaches and insults. Then the child develops a protective reaction and a lie becomes a habit, and, unfortunately, then the child stops trust parents.
Transitional age and falsehood
Sincere contact is very important in adolescence. And if such was lost in the school period – to restore it almost impossible. Become a real problem when the child does not consider parents important in his life, do not understand which help from them can be obtained.
So that there is no complete loss of contact between children and parents, first of all, parents should be ready to hear the truth from the child, whatever it may be. Often adults requiring the truth, they don’t want to hear it, but they want to receive as a result the answer that they want to hear, and the child is easier to lie.
The child needs to explain the consequences of a lie. What she can’t always lead to the desired result, and may reduce contact with parents, and they will no longer believe him.
It is very important to explain to the children that the truth is very important. Create in family rule “Do not lie” and strictly abide by it. AND then both parents and children, as if playing, learn to trust a friend to a friend. After all, trust is so hard to gain and so easy to lose.
